Some of these undertakings are of monumental proportion, piecing together a functional whole from a half dozen fragmented manuscripts; Others less so. Should I focus on completion of a book I started years ago as a study guide for students of Evocation and which has evolved into a freakin' massive, voluminous effort; or should I leave it on the back burner and take the Strategic Sorcery Course like I've been promising myself since the beginning of time?
Contrary to my own nature, I've been very indecisive in this regard, and loathe to select one of these worthy goals as my next major endeavor. A few times, I had actually decided on a course of action, and in one case even begun to work towards the goal, only to have unforeseen circumstances force a change in course, sending em right back to square one, reviewing my mental notes and trying to select another instead.
Being overly contemplative and cautious in itself is not a horrible thing, and I've always prided myself on my meticulous nature; always planning everything down to the very last and most intricate detail. The problem, then, is inertia. Once something is moving, it tends to stay moving unless its motion is affected by another force or element. Or something like that. Hey, I'm not a friggin scientist, ok? The reverse is also true; What isnt in motion, tends to stay motionless. And meanwhile, as I'm sitting here contemplating what to spend my newly found free time on, additional smaller responsibilities are piling up and occupying more and more of it. If I wait too much longer, by the time I choose a project to focus on in my idle time, I won't have any idle time because it will all have been given to things of lesser importance.
So, having understood that I need to stop procrastinating and choose, I am brought back to my conundrum; WHICH to choose. For guidance, I sought neither celestial nor infernal aid, nor did I employ complex and involved methods of divination. No tarot, no pendulum, no nada. I took the advice of a man whom I've never met, but whose philosophy made me a much, much better man and leader. I was introduced to his books when I first joined the US Army, and both his "fictional" and nonfiction works have had an amazing impact on my life, as the solid, practical and beneficial strategies he provides throughout are as effective in managing ones personal and professional lives as they are for going into battle and tearing the enemies of your country a new asshole. The author is Richard Marcinko, and while I'm not going to sit here and espouse the man's greatness ad nauseum, suffice it to say that the strategies and wisdom he shares have been uniquely motivating and effective for me in mundane, professional and magickal life. The particular piece of advice of which I'm speaking now is not a long and eloquent, beautifully worded mantra; Its really quite simple; "When there are too many wheels in motion, too many targets in the air, your only question should be which to shoot first" He further goes on to explain that if a soldier is faced with overwhelming odds and spends too much time deciding which of his assailants to shoot first, he's likely to get killed before making a decision, and therefore the only acceptable choice is to pick the first one that meets your eye, aim and fire.
So thats what I did. The first one that popped into my head is the one I shot and the one I'm going with, and I'm pretty friggin happy about it. In retrospect, I have no idea why this decision was so difficult for me, as now that I've begun the creative process involved with manifesting this idea, it seems as though there should never have been any doubt.
So, a bunch of printed and digitized manuscripts in hand alongside a latin lexicon and other tools of the trade, I begin my next project, having been aided in overcoming indecision by the father of SEAL Team 6. The result will, hopefully, be the rebirth of another Grimoire to add to our corpus.
GrimoireMagick.com is coming along well; I've enlisted the aid of a couple like-minded friends to assist in getting it together and so far the forums section promises to be one hell of a resource. Between the new book, the website and the new position at work, this looks to be shaping up as a busy back half of 2011.